How to stay positive during childbirth

*trigger warning, pregnancy and birth.*

With my upcoming second birth, I am publishing this post for myself more than anyone. I wrote it just a few months after Vigo’s birth but never published it. But I need to remind myself some of these things now, so here goes….

April 20, 2017

My, what an adventure giving birth is. When pain and suffering are so close to beauty and life. I'm no expert on birthing, but I was very pleasantly surprised by how positive I was able to stay during labor with my first baby. Here are some things that helped me to stay positive:

Visualize what is occurring in your body. Your body knows how to give birth. Your uterus is pressing this baby out and working so hard. The best thing you can do is try to relax the rest of your body and give my uterus all the energy and blood it needs to work effectively. It's such a strong and amazing muscle. It's not really pain, it's power. The surges can't be stronger than you, the surges are you. My body is working so hard to push this baby out join it, don't resist it.
Know that every surge (contraction) brings your baby closer to you. This really helped me especially at the beginning of a surge. Because I would want to resist the pain, I would start to squirm and tense up and then with Jako’s (my partner) coaching and my practice, I was able to relax and remember that each surge brings my baby closer. We were making progress.
Talk to your baby. Between surges I talked to our little boy out loud. Saying how happy I was that today we would meet and encouraging him in the good work we were doing together. I kept on saying, "My baby, we're so happy we're going to meet you. You're doing so well."
Relax and rest during breaks in surges (contractions). Along with speaking to my baby, I just tried to breath deeply and relax my body between pushes. I was trying to reserve my strength for when I would work with my body during the final stages of birth to push.
Remember that this won't last forever. This really helped me during labor. To know that I wouldn't be doing this hard work forever. It would come to an end and it would come to a beautiful end at that. I was just viewing it as a really intense wonderful workout. A marathon that ends with a wonderful gift!
Know that women all over the world are giving birth right along with you. And women have been giving birth successfully for centuries. We were made to do this. I have so much respect for mothers now that I am a mother. Giving birth is a big feat, just think of all the amazing women who have given birth to their children.

Before giving birth I prepared and practiced for the birth itself. In addition to taking a birthing class at our birthing center I also read 3 books about childbirth, Childbirth Without Fear, Hypnobirthing, and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way. There is always the possibility for complications to occur during childbirth, but I wanted to plan for the most natural and calm birth possible.

Hypnobirthing and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way were both wonderful resources which explained what is occurring during childbirth. This really helped me to envision my uterus doing hard work and believing that every surge (contraction) was bringing my baby closer to me. These books also provided resources about how to relax your body, to submit and join your body in doing the work.

I have never felt so close to nature as I did when in labor, giving birth to my child. I am amazed at how powerful our bodies are. I am so proud and so glad to be a woman and to be able to have joined with my body in the incredible experience of giving birth.

Any other moms out there have tips for ways to stay positive during labor? What have I forgotten?

Thanks for reading lovelies.

Anna